Pain

Pain is an integral part to our lives and a rather natural reaction is to turn to pessimism in the face of emotional pain.

So many times I found myself asking: "Why?"

But through these difficult times, I came to certain realizations:

Through difficult times, we can better appreciate more walks of life. Through adversity, we learn to appreciate the journeys of others more: how everyone has fought their own battles in their own way to make it to where they are today. Understanding this sheds a more beautiful light towards humanity- also helping us to realize that we are not alone in most of our experiences.

We find courage through adversity. When we choose to accept failure, defeat, heartbreak, and learn to embrace our pain, we can often unfold our more compassionate self- forgiving those who have wronged us, misunderstood us, or misjudged us. The truth is, the most difficult part is not forgiving others, but rather, forgiving yourself.

Time and again, I am reminded that I am my own worst enemy. I do however, firmly believe that in the face of adversity, within the attempt to make peace with ourselves, we will eventually find the will to overcome our pain, and become our own greatest friend.

This will is rooted by courage, stemmed from strength, and empowered by you.

-On a side note, it can also be your own little anecdote to assist others in struggle =]

Our Past

In my last post, I had mentioned how important our attitude can be in terms of interpreting circumstances. Many of us have a past that haunted us, or even worse- a past that still haunts us. It’s a powerless feeling, and it’s easy to become demotivated at the thought of our scary and traumatizing past. Unfortunately, in some cases, we can even fall into depression, becoming but a shadow of who we once were.

Fear is prevalent throughout our lives. But why is it so prevalent?

I have reason to believe that our biggest fears are driven by our failures and our mistakes- the unwise decisions and circumstances we created in the darkness of ignorance.

But let’s take another perspective on it. In our past, we were who we were at that time- something we also can't change. We were characterized by our priorities, maturity, thought process, or whatever that went to influence a decision we made or the result of that decision. At any given point in time, it was the best that we could do, or the best that we decided to do. We didn’t have the hindsight wisdom, the motivation we wished we had, or the virtues required to achieve a desired outcome.

“The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows.”- Buddha

But it is because of our past that we can learn to deal better with the present. It is because of our present that we can learn how to deal better with the future. Remember that we did what we were able to do to the best of our capabilities. The key response is not to let your past failures, mistakes, or regret define you negatively.

“Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” Winston Churchill

Through our pains and through our mistakes, we gained the wisdom to give a helping hand to those who are in need. Let us not be characterized by our failures by staying down and admitting defeat, but rather, by standing up once again to face our failures and our fears with even more courage than yesterday.

"I've come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy." - Tony Robbins

How we deal with failure can define who we are. Amongst many other virtues, strength is a choice, and for those who don’t choose it, they might've uttered ‘I can’t’. In most cases, it’s not that they couldn’t choose to be strong, it’s that they wouldn't. Choose to be influenced by your failures positively, and you will have already chosen to be strong.

One of my all-time favorite quotes: “I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday, and I love today.” William Allen White

Embrace the thought of loving today. Good luck !